I never write in this diary, but now I am going to.
I just want to let the world know that I have the best friend
someone could ever have.
She's all I have and so much more. She's all I need.
She gives me so much, and I hope I give just as much
back. I love her into pieces and SHE BETTER KNOW THAT.
Sweetiepie, if you're reading this. I love you.
Short entry, but oh SO true.
I'm ready to take you home and make it real again.
Christmas was lovely. I don't want it to ever be over.
I think I need to appreciate the people in my life more.
Actually, I need to appreciate everything in my life
Even the misfortunes.
Still no snow.
That's why I'm easy,
Easy like a sunday morning.
I've got 3849384 things to do.
Yesterday a person started to fight with me. He reminded me so much of Gerald. That's why I pretty much owned his pathetic ass. Excuse me for saying that though, I'm sure he's a good person sometimes, when he's not with me.
I </3 Fights.
I love my sister. I really do. She's so the coolest person ever, just so you know.
He misses me.
I've a test on monday, I'm not prepared.
I'm not supposed to be here - So I am leaving.
All I want for Christmas is you.
Some people wait a lifetime
for a moment like this.
I want to touch the earth, and break it in my hand.
God I feel like a rant.
I want to journal!
I'll do it like later.
I miss Live Journal. :(
Even though you're gone, Life goes on.
Life goes on without you baby.
Okay, so I haven't been as good as I thought I would be. You know with the updates here and all. I thought I would like be SO good and write these long long long entries every single day. Yeah, like that would happen. I always think I can do more than I really can. And then I always end up disappointed in the end, which is after only a few days.
Yesterday was a day full of poop. I don't know what it's with me nowadays, but I'm so restless. And my moodswings! Yeah. Don't play with fire.
.. No, but seriously. At first I'm happy and then something happens or someone says something, and then in one second I'm a mess. And it'll last all night.
I think it's because I miss Mally.
And because I'm already tired of school.
But now I'm going to write a proper mail to Mally. She deserves that. <3
ALLEY IS LIKE FRENCH. HOW MUCH DON'T I LOVE THAT, AND HER?
A fly commited suicide last night.
I'll tell you all about that later.
Right now I'm going to write a mail to
Great news today;
HIS Myspace is Deleted.
I thought since I was updating yesterday in here I could do it today again. I don't know if I have much to say today though, at least not as much as I had yesterday. But hey, I can always try.
I want to start by saying that I regret a few things I wrote in my previous entry. I wont change anything in it because it's what I felt like writing then, and if I would change my entries every single time I felt like this then this wouldn't have any use. The whole diary thing. Actually, that's a crazy idea I have - To change what I've written. It's probably because I'm actually ashamed of what I felt and wrote, but seriously what kind of diary is it when I change everything? It wouldn't be a honest diary, it would be like a lie.
Anyway, this is going to be a honest diary.
Nothing will be changed.
Okay, now we got that straight and I'll move on to the thing I regret. It is like this; I was reading through my last entry, right. And my spontanious feeling at one place is that I'm telling hm.. the reader (Which is me.) that I want him to call.
I want to dial his number on my phone. I want to call him, just like I did all those times. All the times when things were good.
And a little later.
I want him to call me. I want the boy I fell in love with to call me. I want him to be so damn perfect.
He'll never be.
(Now you might think I put that quote here to make my entry seem longer, but that's not the case.)
Um. ANALYZE TIME.
Haha, before I used to analyze his e-mails, but obviously I've moved on to my own things now. But that's not so bad. Okay, so. Sure, sometimes I feel like I want to dial his number, just to see. I used to call him so much before, it was like a habit. Now it feels empty. A bit. I'll get over it.
The second thing; I don't actually want him to call me. Not HIM. If he was in an other boy's body, if he wasn't he. If he was someone else. Someone else who was darn perfect. THEN. Then he could call me. But I can't really say that he could call me, because it wouldn't be him. But then that boy could call me. (I don't know how he would get my number though.) Anyway, you get the idea.
Honestly, perfection isn't even needed. He'll be perfect in my eyes even if he isn't all perfect according to whatever poo thingie. I'm not perfect so why should he be? He shouldn't. What makes him different will make him beautiful to me. Enough about that though.
Tonight will probably be just like my previous two nights. But it's okay. Maybe this is the part when I grow and leave it behind me.
And bla bla.
Now this is enough for today.
I just want a happy ever after.
Impossibilites keeps walking in on me.
So long since I was here.
I don't even know why.
Things are so different,
I don't like it.
Not at all.
Is anybody going to save me?
It's too much.