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Igaehinvdo (Come chat everybody Bored as Me)

Member #171925 created: 2006-01-07 18:48:31Simple URL:   

Name: Jessi



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Street child

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Hmmn, What to say about me? Well I enjoy art of all kinds, paintings, drawings, and literary art...I dabble in all forms but don't claim to be an artist. I am simply... normally I would say human but I believe sentient is more the word because humanity as a whole is disappointing...if you wish to know anything else about me simply ask...

Currently trying to get my book published so EVERYONE be looking for that because you must all read it...or die...but wait I can't legally threaten you but I can say that yu might die if you don't read it, but then again you might die if you read it...oh screw it...just please please read it!

      ITS CALLED: The Eternal House of Stuart

Ask me anything, can't promise I'll answer but its worth a try....


~*~Angel of Music or Phantom of Fright~*~

A fathers promise became so blindly kept,
An angel to guide you through every step,
Lyrical beauty, an angel indeed,
To a hopeless, lost child in need,
Years of blind power, the power so strong,
Wrapped heplessly up in night's endless song,
At once I gave the Angel of Music my heart,
But the Phantom of Fright then tore it apart,
I don't know what to do, alone and so scared,
For this moment, all my life prepared,
To face passion, or a hollow end of dark night,
To face the Angel of Music or the Phantom of Fright.


~*~Love in Hate~*~

I am in love,
Yet I am in hate,
No one ever understands me,
He flatters me,
He lets me down,
I don't know what to do,
He gets me high,
I feel so low,
What do I do,
I am in love,
I am in hate,
I don't even understand me.
How is it that I can love you
And hate you at the same time?
I will never understand,
All I know is this love and hate,
and only one will last forever,
I am in love.


~*~To My Valentine~*~

To my valentine i send my love with a twist
With a whisper and a hug and a gentle kiss
My cheeks feel hot and red they glow
Because in my heart i truely know
That when it comes to push or shove
I will always have your love
In the silence, your voice i hear
But your not here, you're unreal i fear
And i will love you throughout the year
I hope i've made that perfectly clear
I stare at the morning roses, covered in mist
It reminds me of you and this feeling of bliss!



An unwilling love,
With an un willing touch,
The unwilling hands,
The unwilling looks,
The unwilling feelings,
The unwilling hearts,
The unwilling couples,
The unwilling boy with the unwilling girl,
The unwanted heartbreak,
The unwanted life,
The unwanted pain,
The early relationshipof the uneasy,
The pain of the unloved,
The mind of the unloving,
The rudeness of the unkind,
The 'un's of the world make no better place,
But pain turns so great that death is the only resort,
And society which is the unwordly beast,
Shun out the unkwowing,
Turns a frown on the unacknowledged death of a teen


~*~My Reply~*~

You asked me to marry you,
You asked me to be the mother of you children,
You asked me to be there when no one else will,
You asked me to love you,
You asked me to simply care,
You asked me to listen and talk to you everyday,
To simply kiss you when you heart feels dispair,
You asked if I loved you,
You asked if I was ready,
You asked if I was okay,
And my reply was simply yes,
But now you ask me how I'll be,
For a year you will be gone,
To fight for me, the baby, and the whole country,
And now my reply is so much more,
I really think you should hear,
I love you my soldier darling,
My heart holds you dear,
I'll miss you but I'll see you agian I know,
WHEN you return to my arms, safely back to our home!



I know your worries,
I feel your pain,
I hear your muffled cry for help,
I step back I back up,
I turn away,
I look to the lake,
Graceful and glissening blue,
It calls me to it,
I pull myself closer,
I step out onto the water,
I turn and look your way,
Everything will be O.K.,
My eyes glow,
I look up I begin to float,
Your angel returns to heaven,
I walk across the soft fluffy clouds,
I look down and see you cry,
I've tried so hardto make you see,
That I am where you are,
And I love you more than any other worldly thing.


I could have sworn you said you loved me,
Words, a whisper from the past tries to bind me,
Wise you were yet blemished, little beauty did you hold,
You were sheltered like a butterfly, before it escapes its cucoon mold,
And somehow I let you go,
Unaware of your beauty, a side of you I didn't know,
Late you were to bloom, now beauty around you radiates and softly flows,
I could kick myself, before you were just the lilly among the rose,
Now with beauty like an orchid never fading, never dying with time,
If only I had been the one to hold you, then I could have made you mine,
But I hated how you looked, I hated how you were,
I hated how you felt, I even hated how you hurt,
You might think of this a plea to have you back, maybe at once it was,
But you went through too much pain, and I know that I was the cause,
Back then I was like a hawk, my words cut through you tore you, as if they were my beak,
Even now I know how much I hurt you, as I watch the tears flow down your cheek,
I lift my finger tips to touch yours,
And all I feel is cold glass, I should have known ofcourse,
Not even my own mirrored reflection wants me,
So alone, tormented, tortured shal I be,
All alone to stare at a broken reflection,
So lost to the world, I lost all connection,
I never thought of myself richly, not a beauty, nor refined,
I thought I was the unlucky soldier, the only woman left behind,
Though I won a few good battles, it never changed the way I felt,
Eventually I lost the war, this war against myself,
I always said I'd rather die than to spend my life alone,
I know I've been alone, emptiness is all I've ever known,
As I sit and prepare to stare again I see as salty tears stain my face,
All in all I'm done, I'm over, quiting this neverending race.


After tonight a child no longer screams,

Amother no longer dreams,

The end of a deep spiritual war,

And the soul cries out no more,

The soul now foun, once so badley lost,

The childs life the painful cost,

The darkness took the child away,

Beneath the ground to forever lay,

Through silent screams and loud silence,

The last blood to break the violence,

Hurt and shame in a mothers eyes,

Her tears so scarce as her angel dies.


HERES ALIL RELIGIOUS RANT>>>> if you don't like it or agree oh freakin with it:

The Lord is a jealous and avenging God; the Lord takes vengeance and is filled with wrath. The Lord takes vengeance on his foes and maintains his wrath against his enemies. The Lord is slow to anger and great in power; the Lord will not leave the guilty unpunished... Who can withstand his indignation? Who can endure his fierce anger? His wrath is poured out like fire; the rocks are shattered before him. The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust him, but ... he will pursue his foes into darkness.

The wrath of God isn't a popular subject. Most people don't like to think about it, and most preachers don't like to talk about it. We like a sweet message of love, love, and more love, not a rough, terrifying message of judgment.

Like it or not, the Lord isn't tame. He isn't safe. God is love, true enough, but his love doesn't mean his wrath isn't real or that he lets us all get away with whatever we feel like doing. The Lord is slow to anger, says Nahum, but he's also great in power, and he won't let the guilty go unpunished. He's good, he cares for those who trust him, but his enemies he will pursue into utter darkness.

When people don't take God seriously, there's a price to pay.



When I first met him, I lost myself,
I put my sense upon a shelf,
Day after day I'd sit and wait,
The pain he caused I just couldn't take,
Now he says goodbye,
Expecting me to cry,
But I shed no tears,
For him they won't fall here,

(And I showed him)
My heart refuses to break,
(I showed him)
I took all I could take,
(I showed him)
He played a losing game,
(I showed him)
Upon me he put no shame!



There is a darkness within myself that i cannot see past or into. If i find a light within me i will grab ahold of it and venture into this darkness. Maybe i will find the source of the voices or finally see the faces that haunt my dreams. Then i will defeat these demons and send them back to the pits from which they came. But first i must find a light. If i do not, then darkness will be all that i am.

Gothic refers to a Romantic literary style which can include supernatural aspects, particularly vampires. This is because many of these stories are set in locales with Gothic architecture. Gothic literature shouldn't be confused with texts in the Gothic language, the earliest written Germanic language, which includes the Codex Argentius, a translation of parts of the New Testament. 





I'm standing on a bridge, I'm waiting in the dark, I thought that you'd be here, by now, but you done pissed me off and now I'm gonna jump, somebody better get me down.

[chorus]: Isn't anyone trying to save me? Won't somebody please help me down? It's a cold,cold night, trying to finish off my life, won't you take me by the hair and just throw me off, I don't know what went wrong but I, I'm gonna jump, yeah yeah

I'm looking for a place, been searching here for ways, wheres the best place to try? Cause nothings going right and everythings a mess, and now I just want to die.


yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yea---------hey looks theres a fire truck!


Theres a dog, pissing on a big oak tree,

Yes, I know, this may seem to you freaky,

but when our friends are gone and the parties over,

all my love will still belong to Rover,

[chorus]: Underneath your car theres a dog named Rover,

But he lives no more cause you ran him over,

that was the car he chose to mark his territory,

and heres the finger you deserve for killing such a good dog, honey.

Because of you~ he forgot the smart place to hide,

Because of you~ I'm running out of pets that survive

I wanna see the dog in all his hasppy antics~ running, barking, playing, drooling.

all in all he's my best friend, its almost like he was my son.




How could I have thought that it was anything more than fake? And how could I just let myself be played? How could I mistake your words and somehow twist their meaning? How could you make me cry when its only been a day? How(?), when I promised to never feel this way? How could I be so gullible as to think that this was finally real? Why?
Why am I so gullible? Why does it always end up like this? Why do I feel like the jerk? Why does it always happen to me? Why? Why do I still call to talk to you? What?
What do I expect you to say? What makes you so attractive to me? What makes me repulsive to you? What do you hold against me that keeps your feelings for me from growing? What? What did I do this time? When?
When did I hurt you so bad, that made it ok for you to hurt me? When did I become the joke, that you can laugh at into the night? When? When did I lett myself become so fake? How? Why?

Why am I so fake?


Wheres the justice? Wheres the peace?
Wheres salvation? Wheres my ease?
How to Cope? How to stay sane?
Where do I go to relax this pain?
This Indigo is fighting, fighting with all her might,
I fear I have no hope, and I can't give up on what is right.
I may be wrong, but only without another option,
I walk a clear path one full of caution,
but danger lurks ahead of me, trapping me in every direction.





Age: 25Year of birth: 1988Month of birth: 5Day of birth: 14

Gender: female

Fantasy race personality: Elf

Elftownworldmap missing.

Place of living: USA-Florida


Known languages
Sign LanguageEnglishFrench

Elfwood artist: No

Elfwood writer: No

Elftown crew wannabe: No

Favorite drawing objects

Computer interests

gothheavy metalopera

Other interests
artcard gameschasing the preferred sex

Civil status: single

Sexual preference: opposite sex

Body shape: fat

Height: 163

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